Posterity

I grew up in a broken home, and when I was younger, I worried a lot about what I'd be like as a father, and how I'd be when I consumed alcohol. As a kid, I had no experience with it, and I thought it might turn me into someone I didn't like, insomuch as I didn't like my father, and he drank a lot.

I don't worry about that now, as I understand that those things I didn't like about my dad when he was drunk were there already, and the booze just amplified it. I still don't care for drinking, but it's got nothing to do with my father anymore.

I still worry about what I'd be like as a father.

I like to tinker. I like to experiment with things I can experiment with, to further my understanding of the world around me. I'm interested in psychology and economics, and the power of incentives. I worry I'd be unable to resist running experiments on my own kids, and really, I'm not sure this is something I should worry about.

I think any parent will have to employ some amount of trial and error, figuring out what will and won't work in raising their kid. I think the difference with me would primarily be deliberacy. i.e. I'd do explicit experiments and document my findings. I'd also debrief my kid, and try to instill an appreciation for the value of science.

Maybe I'd reach further, too.

Last night, This American Life had a show with a few stories about people who had developed some false belief as children that they didn't learn was false until adulthood. One woman thought that "Pedestrian Xing" signs were pronounced, "Pedestrian Zing," as if it were a word instead of an abbreviation. Another woman thought unicorns were real animals that were indigenous to Africa or something. One guy thought that Nielsen families were actually all named Nielsen.

It made me think it might be fun to run an experiment, where, when I had a kid, I'd decide on 3 things I would consistently lie to it about. Something like unicorns being real. I'd tell the kid that there are 3 things I'm lying to it about, and I'd offer some sort of fabulous prize after they'd called me out on each one, with evidence. Probably with some sort of decay, so the prize will be better the sooner they do it.

I like the idea of introducing children to the possibility of deception early on, and incentivizing them to be skeptical, and curious, and to call me, and other people out on their bullshit, using evidence from their own research.

I don't think this is unethical on its face. But I worry about the fact that this stuff is what I look forward to the most about being a parent.

(Crystal isn't pregnant or anything, just reactionary thoughts from the show.)